This was written during a phase where I had recurring bouts of sleep paralysis, something I have dealt with for years. Basically, I would feel like I was awake, lying in bed, and something or someone was coming after me, but I could not move to get away from it or scream for help – a combination of hallucinations and actual physical paralysis. Upon waking from this, I would be too filled with anxiety to go back to sleep.
I was so thankful when someone sent a link to this through a post on Myspace… it gave me the definition to something I thought was just an unpreventable recurring nightmare. I have not experienced it for a few months, mostly because my fiance makes sure I do not sleep on my back, which is the position that tends to trigger it.
My worst nightmares
Happen as if I am awake
I hear a voice, feel a presence
Cannot move from my slumber
To fight, to scream, to break free
From these beings intending harm
I lie afraid, wondering what is to come
Will they find me in this state, paralyzed
Take advantage, take my life, take my soul
When I finally awake, I find myself trembling
Gasping for air, and crying, and wondering why
No salvation came, no one heard the silent screams
The rest of the night, I lay awake terrified of my dreams
This post brought to you by Kristi Hines
Kristi Hines is creator of Kikolani which focuses on blogging tips and social networking. Connect with me on Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn.
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{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
Wow… That sounds crazy. I have insomnia and am a very light sleeper. The slightest sounds wake me up and I feel constantly tired. Thus why I try to do 100 things at once. To tired myself out. Is there a cure for Sleep Paralysis?
Hauntingly provocative poem!
I, when much younger, had, often, the symptom you describe. I would wonder at my brain’s inability to order my limbs to work…
Once, I snapped out of it, the feeling of relief was indescribable!!!
~ Alex from Our Evolution
Yes. I’ve had this happen to me, though luckily, rarely. With me, I feel like someone is actually already holding me down and I can’t move or scream. It is absolutely terrifying because you do feel like you are awake and it is really happening. Thanks for sharing this!
Wow sounds pretty scary and I was thinking about the cause etc.
I’ve been lucky and maybe had a few nightmares.
Sounds almost like some kind of panic attack.
Anyway I hope that whatever it is gets eliminated.
I wanted to stop by and just say hello and the blog is
looking sweet. Excellent work
stumbled
See you around
John Sullivans last blog post..Harnessing the Power of Social Networking
I’ve experienced that but not in quite some time. And it truly is terrifying. You don’t think that you’re dreaming, you can’t run and when you try to scream nothing comes out. When you wake up you still feel very scared.
Kim Woodbridges last blog post..WordPress: How Has Blogging With WordPress Changed Your Life
@Mike: There’s not a cure, just tips such as not sleeping on your back and if you find yourself in that condition, try to focus all of your energy on moving a hand or foot, and you can snap yourself out of it.
@Alexander: I never felt relief when I woke up, always panic. Like something was still there and I just didn’t know it. It was always creepy.
@Angie: I think it is common to feel like someone is sitting on you. The Wikipedia article about sleep paralysis has a photo of a demon sitting on someone’s chest. Good visual interpretation.
@John: It usually was a panic attack by the time I woke up. Especially if I was alone.
Thanks about the blog, and the stumble.
@Kim: Fortunately, I haven’t had it in a couple of months. I attribute it to my fiancé always taking care I don’t sleep on my back, and in general giving me a feeling of safety.
Fortunately I’ve never had this (I’ve also heard it called night-nurse paralysis, I think).
I have had the opposite, though, where my body has failed to paralyse during sleep and I ended up punching the wall when I hit someone in a dream. I woke up pretty sharply after that!
Chriss last blog post..Friday Fun: Orange Runner
i know 2 person who have like this… and it’s hard for them too…
I experienced something like this once and it was so intense I’ll never forget it. The weird thing was, I was actually lying on my stomach and felt someone on my back with his hands around my neck. I could hear him breathing. Every other aspect of the experience was exactly as you described. I’ve never experienced it before or since. Thanks for sharing.
I suppose it’s always better when someone realizes that they are not alone in a certain affliction. The knowledge that their are others suffering from the same condition somehow makes it more bearable.
I’ve actually heard of people who strap a tennis ball to their back as this wakes them up when they do happen to try and sleep in that position.
Sires last blog post..Can You See The Human Apparition In This Splash Of Water
@Chris: That isn’t good either. I guess that is the same kind of thing that leads to sleepwalking and such. Interesting how the body works so differently from one person to another.
@Clara: I think it can be a different experience for everyone. Mine primarily happen when I sleep on my back, but it has happened when I was laying on my side on the couch before. The intruders have been in the forms of someone standing outside my window, staring in, someone standing by where I sleep, and things flying around, and barely touching me, like ghosts. Very intense, and scary, because the surroundings are very real.
@Sire: Finding out I wasn’t the only person who experienced this made it easier to talk to people about it. Otherwise, they think you’re just talking about some sort of freaky nightmare and kind of shrug it off as normal.
I play tennis, and have an abundance of tennis balls. I will try that if it starts happening again.
Nah, I reckon it’s heaps more fun if the fiance pokes you in the ribs. Who knows, it may get him a reward.
Sires last blog post..The Meaning Of Life In A Poem
@Sire: He does that anyway… we’re very into tickle wars!
You are so adorable. I know that this entry has nothing adorable about it, but just in general- cute as a button. I’ve heard a lot of people talk about sleep paralysis before and it sounds terrifying! Is there medication available for it, or is it more of a cognitive behavioral treatment? It’s nice that your fiance watches your sleeping position for you. My boyfriend does the same for me, except that he makes sure I’m not sleeping on my back because I’ve been known to snore a little. Definitely not as severe as paralysis and I hope that you remain crazy nightmares free for a long time.
All the best!
-M.
Morgans last blog post..I Like to Move it, Move it!
@Morgan: Thanks, that is so sweet. So are you! And your site is total eye-candy plus very useful information all in one.
There’s not a medication, mostly just depends on the position you sleep in, and probably your overall feeling of safety. My fiancé is tough, so I know he’d protect me if something were to happen, or comfort me if I have an episode, so I think that in itself has kept me free of this so far.
That poem is spot on – and yes, I know exactly, *exactly* what you are talking about…
I remember feeling a huge sense of relief when I realised other people had the same experience. Then it became a case of ‘well, this is just the way my brain is wired – I can handle this.’
(The worst bit is when I ‘wake-up’ but it is really happening… of course, I’m still asleep, but it sure doesn’t feel like that. Strange thing, the human brain!)
My partner of many years is now alert for it happening (Bless him! he can sense it even when he is deeply asleep) and pokes me until I wake up. That helps enormously!
I’ve never experienced this but have heard of many people have problems with sleep paralysis. Has it gotten any better or do you still have problems with it?
@Moreth: That’s what my fiancé does. Plus he comforts me so I can get past the anxiety after it happens and feel safe enough to go back to sleep.
@Chicago: I have only experienced it once in the last 6 months, which is better than when I used to have it happen much more frequently.
nice story on sleep paralysis.
kind regards.
@Decent Women: I remember the time when I had never heard of it before, and the world of difference it made reading about it. So I like to share my experience with others who may have it, but don’t know it.
That sounds scary, Does it only happen when you sleep on your back or does it just happen more often when sleeping on your back?
Hi, I’ve had sleep paralysis since I was 15. I found a thread on hub pages that I think you will like. I found the thread and noticed that it was very scary for a lot of people so I left some information on things that have been helpful to me (that was about 4 months ago) I’ve left about 5 threads on there since. It seems to be getting a lot of attention. People are finding out that they are not so alone and also getting information from others on how to make it not so scary. Here is the link to the thread.
http://hubpages.com/hub/Sleep-Paralysis-Symptoms–Causes-and-Treatment
I hope this helps! : )
Cynthia Jesseen
When I was a teenager I was able to learn to use sleep paralysis as a gateway to lucid dreams and out of body experiences. When I was a kid sleep paralysis was absolutely terrifying because I didn’t understand what it was. I thought I was some sort of freak and was afraid to approach adults about my experiences. But as I grew older I started going to the library to research the topic and realized that it was related to other strange, spontaneous phenomena, namely out of body experience and lucid dreaming, that I was experiencing. I soon learned to embrace these skills as gifts rather than disorders and have even learned to have OBEs and lucid dreams at will. As I grew into an adult, other concerns took over and I’d experienced fewer and fewer episodes of SP, OBE, and LD. Now I kinda miss them since I spend a third of my life sleeping, and I feel that a lot of that is going to waste if I cannot harness these abilities.